Yuppie’s Lament

They say karma’s a bitch,
but I can’t stick it to the Universe
so I guess I gotta let this one go.

My minivan got a flat tire
and some asshole tore off
the daddy stickman so now my husband
wants to go to marriage counseling.

I wanted to get frozen margaritas.

My favorite yoga pants ripped
which I didn’t realize until I
happened to look in the mirror
during downward dog.

The smoothie shop was closed for construction.

When I got my pedicure the water
was cold and the massage chair
was broken.

I made lasagna for dinner
but we were all out of truffle oil,
so I had to use regular old
olive oil.

I was so mad I baked brownies,
but dropped the pan and the hot
gooey chocolate scattered across
the floor.

It was a terrible, horrible,
no good, very bad day.

My husband says some days are like that.

Even for yuppies.

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